Have Western Men Become Asexual?

There are many times when I agree with Rabbi Shmuley Boteach and many times when he works my nerves. But, this article is rather thought provoking.

The greatest cultural story since the 1960’s is the decline and fall of the Western male, and how women have accommodated that fall by allowing themselves to be treated like garbage by men. It’s now 40 years since the second wave of feminism, and yet to be a guy today is to have your pick of hundreds of women who will sleep with you and expect not only no commitment, but not even courteous treatment. You can burp in their presence, break wind, and they will still go to bed with you. To be a guy is to have women move into your apartment and cook and clean for you, even as you endlessly push off the question of marriage, which you have no intention of addressing anyway.

Once, when I lectured at Yale, a female student perfectly identified for me how it is a man’s world and how it all begins at university: "When it comes to love and relationships the men here sit and pick us out, like a man sifting through a jar of jellybeans for the colors and tastes that he likes, leaving behind all the ones that don’t appeal to his taste buds at the moment."

To be a man today means having access to a seemingly endless array of women who take off their clothes on TV to sell you everything from beer to cars to hamburgers. But in becoming boastful beasts of female prey and losing their sense of awe for women, men have guaranteed their own boredom.


If you’re a man, and a woman can no longer excite you, what will? A bunch of guys hitting a ball with a bat? Watching race cars go in a circle for 500 miles? Do men realize just how pathetic they have become as they endlessly pursue cheap substitutes for a lost sense of erotic excitement? Most of the men I meet aren’t even that attracted to their wives and live in predictable and monotonous drudgery in their marriages as a result. Yes, there is a price to pay for disrespecting women.

Male overexposure to women has even led to the death of the heterosexual man as we know him. If the definition of a heterosexual man is a male who is attracted to women, then most men today are barely heterosexual.

I recently told my mom that marriage might be a nice hobby for me when I retire (she, being retired and having a long-term boyfriend, laughed and politely nixed that logic) but it is definitely not in my range of view or on my list of desires in this lifetime. Fairly recently, on one of my yahoo groups, someone posed the question "what makes a woman marriage material?" The list is co-ed and this is what the replies were reduced to: "she gotta be a fine azz ... doctor who swallows" and "I need a woman with Ambition and earning potential, I aint saying im a gold digga but I aint messing with no broke women! Not to mention the head game must be on point!"

How exactly do you word that in marriage vows?